I firmly believe that you are judged in life not by the simple decisions you make but by the decisions made when life might not be so simple. The same can be said in running. It's not the races when everything feels easy and you achieve an amazing time (that is still wonderful) but rather when things get challenging and you keep moving forward. The courage to succeed is in all of us and it's not about how talented a runner you might be, it's about pursuing your dreams no matter what anyone else says.
For six straight years I have toed the line at the Eastern States 20 miler. At first, it was the challenge of the distance and over time the challenge has turned to how fast can I cover the distance. I never arrived at the Eastern States believing that a sub 2 hour 20 mile effort was possible. I had run as fast as 2:04 but this year was different. My times have been improving at rates that seem alarming fast, especially considering the pace I attempt to run at. Could I cover 20 miles in less than 2 hours? I had dreams that it was possible but it's not about what you dream about the night before but what you do when the moment arrives.
The race started at everything felt fast. Yes, I know I run fast but it felt to fast. I tried to dismiss the thoughts but everything in the first 4 miles told me that race day had arrived and I didn't have it. I was clicking off fast miles but was struggling to hold it together. I passed the four mile mark and began to feel better. For the first time I thought my legs are finally warmed up. I passed through the 5 mile mark at 29:42 and made a mental check in my mind. I was on pace.
5 miles later, the pace felt great. I had a smile on my face and genually felt happy to be out there. There was a light eastern states breeze coming from the side and a group of 3 of us running 4th, 5th, and 6th respectively. I rolled through 10 miles in under an hour and made another mental check mark. Two more boxes to check off and I would be there.
I took the next four miles in stride and when I arrived at the 14 mile mark I was feeling good. I was hoping at that point that I could make a strong final effort in the final 10k of the race. Mile 15 clicked at 5:58 and I was through 15 miles in under an hour and 30 minutes. One check mark left.
Like I said at the beginning, it's not about the races that you feel great in the whole way through. It's about the races that try to beat you down and you refuse to let it happen. By mile 15 I was working my ass off and I knew it. I rolled through mile 16 at 6:04 and then mile 17 at 6:08. The effort was still there but I was fading. 12 seconds had been given back in 2 miles and I didn't have a lot of time to work with. By the time I arrived at the 19 mile mark, my watch read 1:54:08. I was 8 seconds behind pace and needed a killer 20th mile to pull out sub 2. 19 miles into a race there are a lot of thoughts running through your mind. Unfortunately, none of those thoughts involve speed.
Still, I continued to push. I willed myself to run as fast as possible and hoped that I had a 5:51 mile left in me. As the finish line approached I took a quick look at my watch, I had less than a minute to get there. Driven by pure determination, I sprinted. It was that final push where I felt like at any moment I could fall to the ground in total exhaustion but still I sprinted. I finally got my eyes on the clock and saw that I had just a few seconds to round the corner and get across the line. 55...56....57....58....stop. I had the race official shout the time as I crossed, 1:59:58.
Impossible is nothing.
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